Shadow of vernal showers

Absolutely nothing new in the shark movie genre. Bunch of college idiots on jetskis just begging to be devoured by a great white shark. Done a thousand times already.

You don't beat this river

Deliverance, by John Boorman, is a whirlwind of suspense. City folk's canoeing trip going all to shit in the hillbilly territory. It's a timeless classic (from 1972) and the pain and misery almost uncomfortable to watch.

The altar of bones

There's nothing better. Fauda is the greatest series right now. Easily. The news of hearing they're doing the season number four alone and now seeing it. Wow. Blown away. Almost literally.

Let the dreams be real

There's a serial child abductor and murderer nicknamed "The Grabber" at large! A sadistic fuck who kidnaps school children and locks them in the basement of his house. The dungeon has a defunct phone that gives real or imaginary comfort to the locked children. We are lead to believe there's former victims on the other end of the line! A chilling story (courtesy of Joe Hill), but the unexplained bits turn down the thrills a notch.

No-one deserves the impossible

A rodeo horse trainer OJ Haywood (Daniel Kaluuya) is on a UFO hunt! He needs to capture the perfect shot of the object, otherwise no-one believes him. With the help of his sister Emerald Haywood (Keke Palmer), tech salesman Angel Torres (Brandon Perea) and documentarian Antlers Holst (Michael Wincott) he's even going to shoot some proper video evidence. Nope, by Jordan Peele, is a creepy and strangle little thing, but oddly satisfying to watch.

Just a bullet away

Wrong Place, by Mike Burns, is yet another one of Bruce Willis's retirement plans. And again, it's one of those things. You know they are making it seriously, but oftentimes you think are they just fucking with you because it's just too shitty to be true. It's comical, looks like a crime parody, just a shit fucking movie where nothing makes sense.

Ignore the chaos, just keep dancing

Beaches aren't safe because the fucking sand sharks prey on people. The organizers of a beach party aren't too happy, but obviously they overlook the grave danger. Brooke Hogan, the daughter of professional wrestler Hulk Hogan, as the scientist Sandy Powers investigating the great beasts. I've Snow Sharks aka. Avalanche Sharks lined up, I've heard it's even worse.

Man bites man

People are slicing up specimens to understand the concept of a zombie. They are hunting these freaks down for information. Maybe they can be domesticated. It's their only hope because zombies are ruling the earth and humans have to live in bunkers. And they are losing their shit, so the research must pay off. George A. Romero's finest movie of the undead.

A powder keg of explosive rage

Kai is a nomadic soul. A hero and a phenomenon at first, sicko murderer the next. From hero to a cold-blooded callous killer in three months. A documentary of a drifter dude who is a cunt.

Pure motorized instinct

I don't know if zombies should have stayed this way. Down-witted, clumsy and slow as fuck, but I like the idea how the surviving humans have possibilities to fight these monsters. Even having fun while doing it. Why to panic when you are locked safely inside a supermarket and mercilessly fathom its supply from instant coffee, cigarettes, caviar, whisky and ammo? George A. Romero's Dawn of the Dead from 1978 is cool, but I prefer Zack Snyder's remake from 2004. 

A family farm

Midway the movie, there was an unexpected twist that made all the difference. Not as exciting as the first one Orphan (2009), but the story is as deranged as they come. And it's pretty bloody.

Bamboo umbrellas for the drinks

Released in 1979, The Jerk is Steve Martin's first starring role in a feature film. His knack for both physical and verbal comedy was so smoothed and charismatic already that he could easily hold up a full-lenght movie on his shoulders. He co-wrote it too. And Carl Reiner, a legend in his own, directed the piece. Sure, some of the humour is quite out-dated, bordering on stupid even, but most of the time a hoot.

Lust for desire

A retired school teacher orders herself a playboy. For sex. The sexworker is Leo Grande. They connect also with talking. It's interesting if you ignite into this kind of thing, but if you don't, it's a boring ordeal. Emma Thompson and Daryl McCormack do their bit effortlessly though.

A passing moment of hunting humans

Another one of Bruce Willis's before the retirement gigs. And just like the rest of them, a complete waste of time. Maybe the worst movie of the century. 90 minutes felt like ages. It's not even shit for brains, just hysterically brainless junk.

The fire that burns

Malte has an incurable brain tumor. To avoid future pain and suffering, he thinks active euthanasia is the way to go. He’s accompanied by his friends on an RV journey from Sweden to Switzerland, to complete the assisted suicide thing. It’s both laughter and tears. Dag för Dag (Day by Day) is quite a forgettable Swedish drama comedy. Coincidentally Sven Wollter, the actor portraying the dying man, died before the release of the film from complications caused by COVID-19. The movie remains his last on his remarkable career. He was 86 years old.

Safer to be feared than loved

When the true nature of things are revealed in the end, you fast-forward all the episodes and as much of the scenes you can muster in your mind and realize how disturbing is this shit. There's a serial killer on the loose in a small town of Wind Gap, Missouri. The slaughtered girls eventually get the attention from the FBI and the press and it's a terrifying puzzle or there will be more victims. Marti Noxon's miniseries is close to a masterpiece, based on Gillian Flynn's debut novel.

The cave-man clasps the seer

The owner of an industrial scale company the Blancos Báscules factory, Julio Blanco (Javier Barem) tries to keep the relationships with his family and co-workers and colleagues in balance, just like the product he represents, but it's dancing on a tightrope. El buen patrón (The Good Boss) is a brilliant satire written in a wonderfully sarcastic tone. Directed by Fernando León de Aranoa.

Waking up on the right side of dirt

A young lady woman Kya Clark lives all by herself on a swamp because her bastard father scared the rest of the family away then disappeared himself. She doesn't intend to leave the marsh, not by a long shot, she loves the place, the nature and the animals too much. She also gets attention from the lads in the neighbouring town, so it's all good. Until a body is found. Where the Crawdads Sing, by Olivia Newman, starts out great, quiets down a little too much the rest of the movie, but an intriguing story and enough a gripping drama. Based on a best-seller by Delia Owens.

2022

MOVIES

The Velvet Queen (Marie Amiguet, Vincent Munier)
Boogie Nights (Paul Thomas Anderson)
Tisdagsklubben (Annika Appelin)
Coming Home in the Dark (James Ashcroft)
All Quiet on the Western Front (Edward Berger)
Scream (Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett)
The Red Ghost (Andrey Bogatyrev)
Death on the Nile (Kenneth Branagh)
The Ritual (David Bruckner)
Copshop (Joe Carnahan)
Blood Simple (Joel Coen, Ethan Coen)
Orphan (Jaume Collet-Serra)
The Dry (Robert Connolly)
The Conversation (Francis Ford Coppola)
The Northman (Robert Eggers)
Roadgames (Richard Franklin)
No Time to Die (Cary Joji Fukunaga)
The Comeback Trail (George Gallo)
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (Terry Gilliam)
Supernature (Ricky Gervais)
Silent Night (Camille Griffin)
The Middle Man (Bent Hamer)
The Long Kiss Goodnight (Renny Harlin)
Mother (Bong Joon Ho)
Narrow Margin (Peter Hyams)
Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery (Rian Johnson)
Adaptation (Spike Jonze)
Komisario Palmun erehdys (Matti Kassila)
Laitakaupungin valot (Aki Kaurismäki)
Le Havre (Aki Kaurismäki)
Top Gun: Maverick (Joseph Kosinski)
Herself (Phyllida Lloyd)
Don't Look Up (Adam McKay)
The Changeling (Peter Medak)
Paul (Greg Mottola)
Who killed Santa? (Laura Murphy)
The Menu (Mark Mylod)
Nobody (Ilya Naishuller)
The Lost City (Aaron Nee. Adam Nee)
Wrong Turn (Mike P. Nelson)
Jack Strong (Wladyslaw Pasikowski)
Arctic (Joe Penna)
Persian Lessons (Vadim Perelman)
In the Line of Fire (Wolfgang Petersen)
Run Hide Fight (Kyle Rankin)
Night of the Living Dead (George A. Romero)
Tunturin tarina (Marko Röhr)
Don't Breathe 2 (Rodo Sayagues)
Mean Streets (Martin Scorsese)
The Duel (Ridley Scott)
Unbreakable (M. Night Shyamalan)
Dawn of the Dead (Zach Snyder)
Duel (Steven Spielberg)
The Mortuary Collection (Ryan Spindell)
The Last Execution (Franziska Stünkel)
The Royal Game (Philipp Stölzl)
Wild Tales (Damián Szifron)
Peruna (Joona Tena)
Troll (Roar Uthaug)
The King's Man (Matthew Vaughn)
Dune (Denis Villeneuve)
Witness for the Prosecution (Billy Wilder)
Last Night in Soho (Edgar Wright)
The Father (Florian Zeller)
What Lies Beneath (Robert Zemeckis)

SERIES

I Know This Much Is True (Derek Cianfrance)
Seinfeld (Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld)
Rake (Peter Duncan, Richard Roxburgh, Charles Waterstreet)
After Life (Ricky Gervais)
Norsemen (Jon Iver Helgaker, Jonas Torgersen)
Vikings (Michael Hirst)
Dexter (James Manos Jr.)
Time (Jimmy McGovern)
Money Heist (Álex Pina)
Napamiehet (Janne Reinikainen, Tommi Korpela, John Lundsten)

R.I.P.

Shinzo Abe (politician) born 1954 (aged 67)
Madeline Albright (secretary of state) born 1937 (aged 84)
Kirstie Alley (actress) born 1951 (aged 71)
David Andersson (musician) born 1975 (aged 47)
Angelo Badalamenti (composer) born 1937 (aged 85)
Chris Bailey (musician) born 1957 (aged 65)
Peter Bogdanovich (director) born 1939 (aged 82)
Gary Brooker (musician) born 1945 (aged 76)
James Caan  (actor) born 1940 (aged 82)
Irene Care (singer) born 1959 (aged 63)
Manny Charlton (musician) born 1941 (aged 80)
Robbie Coltrane (actor) born 1950 (aged 72)
Julee Cruise (musician) born 1956 (aged 65)
Betty Davis (singer) born 1945 (aged 77)

Charlbi Dean (actress) born 1990 (aged 32)
Ruggero Deodato (director) born 1939 (aged 83)
Lenny von Dohlen (actor) born 1958 (aged 63)
Elizabeth II (Queen) born 1926 (aged 96)
Andy Fletcher (musician) born 1961 (aged 60)
Jean-Luc Godard (director) born 1930 (aged 91)
Mihail Gorbatshov (president) born 1931 (aged 91)
Gilbert Gottfried (comedian) born 1955 (aged 67)
Steve Grimmett (musician) born 1959 (aged 62)
Philip Baker Hall (actor) born 1931 (aged 90)
Heikki Haavisto (politician) born 1935 (aged 86)
Jussi Hakulinen (musician) born 1964 (aged 57)
Terry Hall (musician) born 1959 (aged 63)
Estelle Harris (actress) born 1928 (aged 93)
Taylor Hawkins (musician) born 1972 (aged 50)
Anne Heche (actress) born 1969 (aged 53)
Heikki Hedman (athlete, sports commentator) born 1940 (aged 81)
Janne Heiskanen (musician) born 1979 (aged 43)
Hempo Hildén (musician) born 1952 (aged 69)
Juha "Agathon" Hintikka (musician) born 1968 (aged 53)
Bo Hopkins (actor) born 1942 (aged 84)
William Hurt (actor) born 1950 (aged 71)
Wilko Johnson (musician) born 1947 (aged 75)
Maxi Jazz (musician) born 1957 (aged 65)
L.Q. Jones (actor) born 1927 (aged 94)
Ilkka Kanerva (politician) born 1948 (aged 74)
Jack Kehler (actor) born 1946 (aged 75)
Gord Kirchin (musician) born 1961 (aged 60)
Mervi Krusberg (co-worker) born 1974 (aged 48)
Jaakko Kuusisto (composer, conductor) born 1974 (aged 48)
Diane LaVey (satanist) born 1942 (aged 80)
Mark Lanegan (musician) born 1964 (aged 57)
Angela Lansbury (actress) born 1925 (aged 96)
Mariusz Lewandowski (painter) born 1960 (aged 62)
Jerry Lee Lewis (musician) born 1935 (aged 87)
Ray Liotta (actor) born 1954 (aged 67)
Antti Litja (actor) born 1938 (aged 84)
Meat Loaf (musician, actor) born 1947 (aged 74)
Vesa-Matti Loiri (entertainer) born 1945 (aged 77)
Robert LuPone (actor) born 1945 (aged 76)
Ilkka Lähteenmäki (musician) born 1942 (aged 80)
Stuart Margolin (actor) born 1940 (aged 82)
Dan McCafferty (musician) born 1946 (aged 76)
Christine McVie (musician) born 1943 (aged 79)
Siniša Mihajlovic (footballer) aged 1969 (53)
Esa Moilanen (musician) born 1961 (aged 61)
Olivia Newton-John (actress) born 1948 (aged 73)
Irene Papas (actress) born 1929 (aged 93)
Pelé (footballer) born 1940 (aged 83)
Wolfgang Petersen (director) born 1941 (aged 81)
Sidney Poitier (actor) born 1927 (aged 94)
Mino Raiola (football agent) born 1967 (aged 54)
Ivan Reitman (director) born 1946 (aged 75)
Börje Salming (ice hockey player) born 1951 (aged 71)
Anneli Sauli (actress) born 1932 (aged 89)
Edgar Savisaar (politician) born 1950 (aged 72)
Klaus Schulze (musician) born 1947 (aged 75)
Burke Shelley (musician) born 1950 (aged 71)
Liz Sheridan (actress) born 1929 (aged 93)
Dave Sherman (musician) born 1966 (aged 55)
Henry Silva (actor) born 1926 (aged 95)
Jarkko Sipilä (journalist) born 1964 (aged 57)
Tony Sirico (actor) born 1942 (aged 79)
Paul Sorvino (actor) born 1939 (aged 83)
Trevor Strnad (musician) born 1981 (aged 41)
Al Strobel (actor) born 1940 (aged 82)
Alec John Such (musician) born 1951 (aged 70)
Ilkka Suominen (politician) born 1838 (aged 89)
Aarne Tanninen (journalist) born 1931 (aged 90)
Ivana Trump (businesswoman) born 1949 (aged 73)
Nik Turner (musician) born 1940 (aged 82)
Heikki Ursin (uncle) born 1947 (aged 74)
Vangelis (composer) born 1943 (aged 79)
Fred Ward (actor) born 1942 (aged 79)
David Warner (actor) born 1941 (aged 80)
Vivienne Westwood (fashion designer) born 1941 (aged 81)
Alan White (musician) born 1949 (aged 72)
André Wilms (actor) born 1947 (aged 74)
John Zazula (music industry executive) born 1952 (aged 69)