The violent and the depraved

The outbreak of the Alvin virus turns people in Taipei into zombielike smiling freaks and sadists who kill and torture people for fun. Reckon, never saw a Taiwanese film before. It's already a strong contender for the most blood-curdling movie of the year. And it's a pretty groovy still!

Prove your worth through courageous acts

Quite like Tony Soprano's Bada Bing in The Sopranos, Plato (Andreas Karras) runs a Greek club The Bezonians. It's a proper place for misfits, gangsters and hookers. Things get particularly heated when he loses 50K in a single poker match. Watchable little thing, but unexciting and never in a million years close to Guy Ritchie's Snatch that it thinks it is.

Death is water's ally

Scandinavian Union, year 72 of New Time. After the Water Wars and the Twilight Century, the World is running out of fresh water. The remaining water is controlled by a military dictatorship. Water criminals are severely punished. Veden vartija, by Saara Saarela, is a Finnish sci-fi movie. A rare breed and it's a decent attempt at that, but a disappointing effort. Some of the shit is almost embarrassing.

I for an eye

Pera (Matti Onnismaa) wants to try something kinky. Teemu Nikki's (Armomurhaaja, Sokea mies joka ei halunnut nähdä Titanicia) 2008 short movie Kaveri is a hilarious cult classic.

Tossed around by the forces of fate

At first, they decided to go with the laconic Aki Kaurismäki route. It backfires. Then it gets weird, just for the sake of being weird. Backfires. The story of a woodcutter who loses practically everything he owns, is not particularly well delivered.

Love in a cold world

Mother is helpless when a whole village thinks her wee little daughter killed her brother by pushing him into a gushing river. The mother, a policewoman by trade, is losing her shit of the malicious gossip and what she thinks she witnessed. Norwegian Storm, by Erika Calmeyer, ain't one of those uplifting stories.

Easier to kill, harder to survive

A soldier is discharged from the army, makes a deal with a private contractor, fucks off to Berlin on a mission, the mission gets compromised and people die. A generic and a bit confusing, but an exciting thriller. The cast includes Chris Pine, Ben Foster, Eddie Marsan and Kiether Sutherland.

Shadows stay in front or behind

A James Bond movie directed by Michael Apted in 1999, starring Pierce Brosnan as the agent 007, Denise Richards as the Bond girl Dr. Christmas Jones, Judi Dench as Bond's superior 'M" (the head of M16), Desmond Llewelyn as 'Q' (the head of Q division) and Robert Carlyle and Sophie Marceau as the main antagonists Renard and Electra King. The theme song performed by Garbage. Europe is about to get destroyed by an oil heiress and an international terrorist who can't feel pain. Luckily, The British Secret Intelligence Service is on the case.

Parked into the light

The Grump wrecks his red 1972 Ford Escort and to find a similar car he travels to Hamburg, Germany. Mielensäpahoittaja Eskorttia etsimässä is a comedy that isn't funny. Directed by Mika Kaurismäki.

Every new discovery is just a reminder we're all small and stupid

This is crazy cool story telling. You don't exactly need to comprehend all the intricacies of the script to succumb in its magic. Everything Everywhere All at Once, by Dan Kwan and Daniel Scheinert, is a visually engaging masterpiece. A Chinese immigrant, a laundromat owner, is swept up into an insane and eventful adventure between universes. Haven't seen such a vibrant and energetic movie for a while.

The one who sells ropes

Best movie of the year I've seen thus far. A yacht trip of the super-rich has all the makings of a catastrophe. The eccentric millionaires lives are suddenly turned upside down by alcohol, sea sickness, a Marxian boat captain, a severe storm and pirates. Wickedly funny and entertaining satirical black comedy! Outstanding. Sadly, one of the stars Charlbi Dean died shortly after the film's release. She was 32.

Never underestimate the power of erection

A bloody fucken hoot. An exclusive gourmet club is providing the main course and its five upper-class members try to identity a mystery exotic ingredient. This short movie was an instant classic and its macabre comedy makes you laugh still!

Death is one of poetry's most exalted themes

A gothic thriller packed full of grief, revenge and pinch of occult symbolism. Detective Augustus Landor (Christian Bale) and a cadet Edgar Allan Poe (Harry Melling) investigate the hanging of another cadet at the United State Military Academy at West Point, New York. A slowly paced thing, but enwrapped in a stunning cinematography and a proper enigmatic story.

It ain't policemanly

Ain't this a fucking crazy story. A prank call that led to a sexual assault. They say nearly all of the events in this movie are true. Fascinating, but sick and weird.

Still following the star

Bend of the River (1952) includes the traditional western features such as indians, gunslingers, card hustlers, settlers, town drunks, heroes and villains. But enough poetic depth and wisdom to keep it all together. And it's a beautiful good-looking film, courtesy of Anthony Mann. Starring James Stewart, Julie Adams, Rock Hudson and Arthur Kennedy.

Forever alone

An Auschwitz survivor Herschel Haft aka. Harry Haft is looking for his girlfriend who was also captured by the nazis. He thinks she doesn't know he's alive, doesn't know Harry lives in New York, but if his name is in the papers, she'd possibly read it. So Harry needs a fight, a good fight, to break the worldwide news. A match against Rocky Marciano would make good publicity. It ain't easy. Harry is a troubled and scarred soul. He boxed against the other jews in win-or-die fights in Auschwitz-Birkenau to survive himself and his past is haunting every second. Finding her lost love might bring at least little comfort. The Survivor, by Barry Levinson, is a heartfelt movie, an arresting story, but pacing of the piece too slow. 

The door that used to open inwards

English kind of bleak that is almost too real. A working glass family - a taxi driver dad, cashier dad and two children - getting by week in week out in a somewhat derelict London housing estate. It's trademark Mike Leigh alright. Excellently written, directed and performed.

Shoveling cowshit in Tuscany

Interesting but hardly leaving a lasting remark. They say it's inspired by the true events that took place in the world famous fashion house and the dynasty known as Gucci. It all comes to a disappointing popcorn of endless chit-chat, little tax fraud and death. They also say that the performances are great, but they aren't really, but the actors, they are aplenty. Including Al Pacino, Salma Hayek, Lady Gaga, Adam Driver, Jared Leto and Jeremy Irons.